Charmaine Anthony, a native of St. Lucia, shares with us her journey from childhood to present day. It is a journey that is not unlike many of ours however the standout message in Charmaine’s journey is that we must take advantage of every opportunity. We must always look for ways to live out our passions, stay grounded and, most of all, go for life because it is there for all of us to benefit from.
Charmaine’s Story
I grew up in rural St Lucia, born into a large family of 11 siblings and I am number 9. We were neither poor nor well-off. Our financial means were not great but we were close-knit. Both my parents were farmers so that was our sustenance in every way. I enjoyed my childhood. It was challenging at times but today I am reaping the benefits of my journey as a child of farmers. My siblings and I had to help on the family farm. Sometimes we would miss school but, as I alluded to earlier, it was these experiences that made me who I am today. Having missed school, I had to put in the extra work to ensure I was not at a disadvantage. It helped me to become a productive person overall, having to manage all that I did at an early age.
I never complained, even at this early period. Instead, I looked for the value and made it a part of my life. Additionally, being so involved in family life kept me out of trouble and my parents were strict individuals who did not allow many things such as outings with friends.
Even though we did not have a lot of “things”, my parents took great care of us. We didn’t have the “luxuries” but we got what we needed and were happy. Staying healthy and eating well were very important and our parents never compromised on that. We were forced to be very creative growing up because of our limitations. We did not have a television to entertain us as my other friends did and so we designed our own games and activities to occupy ourselves. Games that allowed us to learn through exploring our world and challenging ourselves to come out on top. I believe this experience was the starting point that helped us to understand how capable we were as children and it has followed me through to present day. I learned how to be grateful for what I had and that made it seem like we had so much more.
TBWM: As a child did you ever compare yourself with your friends who seemingly had more?
Charmaine: I think it was more of an awkward feeling than a comparison. There was a certain inability to have certain conversations because of the difference in our lifestyles. My parents were farmers. My mother vended at the market and, sometimes, I would accompany her. She was not a lawyer or doctor or got dressed up and went to an air-conditioned office. Did that make me ashamed of her? No way! I admire her industriousness and her business mind to this day. What I will I say is that we grew up with certain values instilled in us, at the end of the day it was a status situation. To combat those feelings or projected thoughts from those around us, we were taught not to be envious or jealous of what others had. We were taught the values of hard work. Values my parents lived. That was what we saw and appreciated, admired and emulated. They were both hard workers, which, in my mind, was a richer experience for me. One that could never equate to material things. It is natural that I would occasionally think about a different scenario, did I dwell on it? No, there was no resentment or longing or any feeling like that.
TBWM: What is one major challenge that you had to overcome?
Charmaine: Sometimes we go through situations in the present and are clueless to the benefits in the future. Remember I mentioned that I was number 9 of 11 siblings, so I had two younger siblings. In this period of my life, our family life was a bit more challenging. I finished High school and having done-extremely well I applied to go to college. I knew there were financial challenges and, coupled with that, my younger siblings needed to finish high school. Clearly they would have been the priority. My parents could not afford to send me to college. I did not even bother to share the fact that I had gotten an acceptance letter from the college because I already knew the situation.
TBWM: How did that make you feel? After all you did work hard.
Charmaine: I felt bad and, yes, I had worked hard, but when you are very familiar with what is going on in your family situation, there is a level of acceptance that comes with that knowing. I guess to some extent I was mature, and I understood the financial challenges my parents faced because I was there in the middle of everything. I recall sitting down and thinking about the situation at which point I decided I was not going to give up, especially after a friend told me she heard my name being called at the orientation. I thought hard about ways to remedy my situation and get myself into College.
After high school, they usually place us at a company to intern for job training. I was assigned to a particular company for the 2-month summer break and I thought to myself maybe if I went to them they may sponsor me. So, I went to the General Manager with my extra-ordinary request, making representation for myself. They were not able to help at the time, he told me, and so I went back to the drawing board. I prayed then I devised a plan and identified a public official who, in my mind was very keen on developing young people at the time. I visited the offices, his offices. I remember the feeling of excitement, but was told the gentleman was otherwise engaged. I decided to wait. After waiting for some time, another gentleman approached me to find out why I was there. After explaining, he said, “Okay, here’s what I can do for you”. He walked me through the process of obtaining bursaries. Luckily, I had walked with my certificates and everything I needed. The point is this: if someone was going to help me I was ready to be helped.
After the process which included an interview I was awarded a grant to cover my tuition and a few other expenses. Despite that, I still needed some cash in advance, which I borrowed from family and close friends promising to repay once the bursary was paid. I also needed uniforms and books and this was its own story. There is a family friend who would usually give me a gift every year for my birthday and so I approached her and suggested she give me the gift as material to make uniforms for school because I had no other way of getting it. I think I got two bottoms and two tops. I started without textbooks, maybe one note-book, but I was in and that was the major part of the hurdle being overcome. Over time, I was able to buy the books one at a time and rent other texts where I could.
I was not going to be stopped. I pushed myself through and at the end of my college journey I was second highest in my class. I was also being considered for a national scholarship. My college years were an incredibly challenging period in my life. I jumped in the fire all by myself and at a young age too. I was 17. Taking on the challenge head on allowed me to appreciate my results all the more in the end. I remember my graduation being rained out but still having the opportunity to walk across the stage to receive my award and the accompanying accolades. What a feeling of gratitude, accomplishment and pride hearing the words “Who also receives the award for academic excellence”. I beamed from ear to ear. I went back to the gentleman who helped me when I needed it most and thanked him for taking a chance on me. I proudly reported that I made it to the top of my class. Being in that moment made me feel extremely good just knowing I did not squander the opportunity that was given to me.
TBWM: What word would you use to describe yourself?
Charmaine: Resilient – I think in so many situations I have lived and breathed resilience. I have been through a few tough ones.
TBWM: I’m listening and the main thing that’s coming through is that you do not allow anything to deter you. Was there anything in your childhood that fueled that determination, your future resilience and that you are a go-getter and a creator of your own opportunities?
Charmaine: Well, I believe a lot of who I am, I owe to seeing how my mother lived her life. I cannot speak to an experience I had specifically except the one my mother told me about the day I stopped breathing. There is not much I can say because it is all sketchy, suffice to say that I must have been about 3 or 4 years old or maybe younger when I was pronounced dead. I think I might have been going through something which I have yet to fully understand. I was stretched out, they say, unresponsive. The whole neighborhood was at my house. It was pandemonium, I was told. My dad was called and the message sent was that I was dead. That is the only thought I have that could possibly point to me being this resilient because I am here today.
TBWM: So, you created an opportunity for yourself and furthered your education. You didn’t sit back and say “my parents can’t afford it so I won’t go”. You sought out ways to make it happen. What would you tell a young person right now who may be faced with a similar situation or even a woman who is meeting some significant roadblocks?
Charmaine: I would say, do not give up, but, more importantly, if one window closes, it is not the end of the world. I would also encourage that individual to be open to different ideas or avenues that could be taken to accomplish the goal. Speak to people and put yourself out there as long as there is no compromise of who you are. I went out and took a chance to speak with someone whom I thought could help and they did. It is either yes or no….
Follow more of our conversations at:
Google Podcast
Apple Podcast
iHeart Radio
Playerfm
FOLLOW CONVERSATIONS ON OUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL
Popular Stories Right now
Finding Your Inner Balance
Top 7 Reasons To invest in Real Estate
Hold On To The Promise!
Join Our Community – JOIN
